Thursday, November 18, 2010

good ole cma's... nutso as ever.

so, as we all know i get a little country award happy because a. who doesn't love to see some tacky. b. i love seeing zac brown band kick ass and take names!! and guess what!? they did!!! again!!!! hooray!! best new flippin' artist bitches!!!!! and my girls were just beautiful!!!!!!! yay!!!

best dressed... drum roll pleaaaaasssseeee...
this was easy. gwyneth paltrow, love of my life, looked ah-mazing in atelier versace. her legs are out of control. i love the cut outs on this dress. simple, but super interesting. i think it's just stunning. and her performance was just fabulous. she is a classy lady!!!

now, on to the crazy... 
 someone please explain to me why in the heck kathrine heigl was even at the awards!? my lord i find her obnoxious. and this dress just likes like a baaaaaad bridesmaids gown. ew. and it is super unflattering around her armpit fat. totally not attractive. uh.
 sheryl crow is seriously one of the most beautiful women on the planet. buuuuut, there is something off about this gown. my guess is that it looks better in person, but on camera is just looks very blah and ill fitting. her hair and makeup look STUNNING and ohmylord i want all of her bracelets.
 well, on the upside it looks like nicole kidman is laying off the injectables. thank the lord, but this look is just very boring. this d&g dress is okay, but the shoes are disgusting!!! they make a tall, leggy chic look short and stubby. no bueno.
 okay, leighton meester. i don't hate this look. the dress is emilio pucci and sorta fun. the shoes are genius, but where i loose it is the hair and makeup. her hair looks like an afterthought and her makeup is no existent.
 i seriously had no idea who this was... it's julianne hough!? crazy? the hair totally threw me. and this massive georges chakra dress totally makes me wanna hit babies. it's like halloween vomited on her. she's so petite and this dress just swallows her whole. and that hair!!! it's terrible. this is just a mondo fail.
 i would love to get to do this chicks makeup. she's from lady antebellum and she just always looks like a drag queen at these shows. she is clearly very pretty, but eh... i don't know... the big hair, the over done eyes, the awful dress. that crumb catcher is just over bearing... forget crumbs that thing could catch a full sandwich. not good.
martina mcbride is so stinking cute, but this aluminum foil dress is not cute. it makes her right shoulder look like she's wearing football pads and she appears to have a pouch were the rouching meets up. i guarantee that there is not an ounce of fat on the chick, so that's just poor construction. plus, i really don't like the shoes. dark ankle straps = short legs. even if your a thousand feet tall. see nicole kidman.
 so here's the thing. i love this monique lhuillier dress. i really do. but fashion 101. DO NOT match your eye shadow to your gown. geez manetti. and jennifer nettles has been doing this long enough to know that, but i do love the dress. the hair is a bet manic and the makeup is just AWFUL. she's making enough money to have a pro do her makeup... so come on jenn... better luck next time.
oh geez. taylor swift in a boring monique lhuillier dress with boring hair and boring liquid liner. her style  bores me. come to think of it her music bores me too... but i don't want to make her cry cause she seems very sweet. but boring.
 ah! enough said.
what the eff was leann rimes thinking!? she's wearing a ports1961 sundress to an award show?! i think she has lost her mind. between all of her crazy tweets and news reports it's ah-mazing that she hasn't shaved her head yet. but seriously, she and eddie ciberan are definitely going to be together forever.
apparently miranda lambert was rolling her eyes while gwyneth was singing. i hope that's not true. but i think she looks pretty fabulous in this sherri hill dress. i would change the position of the straps because i don't find the off the shoulder flattering. but she really looks pretty. love the earrings.
when bad clothes happen to good people. yikes. yikes. oh dear. hmm. well... uh... right. so this is a talbot runhof and it makes me sad. it turns, literally, one the most beautiful women on the face of the earth into a hot damn mess. this is just schizo. dear carrie underwood you are better than this. i expect more.

so, that was just a taste of the crazy that went down at the cma's last wednesday. so tell me, who was your favorite!? who was just a hot mess!? did you hear gwyneth sing!? what did you think? 

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