nothing says christmas like a crazy-ass ballerina movie...

wow. so, i have to admit, honestly i was terrified to see this film because i wasn't sure how freaky it was going to be. i may have cursed loudly a handful of times, but it wasn't the screamfest that i feared. the story follows a young ballerina nina, natalie portman, who lands her dream role as the the lead in her ballet companies vamped up version of swan lake... which let me say is a friggin weird ballet... it's about a girl who is turned into swan and has to fall in love to break the curse, but her evil twin comes and steals the man she loves... so she kills herself... creepy right!?! back to the movie. nina is given the role and basically starts down a path of crazy. she develops this terrifying rash on her back and begins this obsessive need to scratch and pick and pull at every piece of irritated skin... it's literally the most disgusting thing i've ever seen. meanwhile, her director, vincent cassel, is putting tons of pressure on her to get the part of the black swan right... nina's uptight therefore having a hard time letting go of perfection and becoming the visceral and passionate black swan. she begins to suspect that the companies new free spirit, lily, is trying to steal her roll. lily is brilliantly played by mila kunis and it has to be said, is super sexy in this film!!! and they totally get it on... so strange... 

nina's visions of crazy get worse and worse until you absolutely have no idea what is real and what this crazy bitch is just making up. her mother gave up her own ballet career to have nina and is absolutely obsessed with her daughter. she cries and paints pictures of nina. WEIRD! no wonder this girl is a nutter.

so, that's the basic story. you get it. the film is really beautifully done. the costumes are brilliantly designed by amy westcott and the mulleavy sisters... yes, the rodarte ladies! ah-mazing! i seriously want to run out and buy leg warmers, tights, tutus, shrugs, tanks, etc. you name it, i want it. the acting is absolutely suburb. natalie portman deserves all the awards she wins for this film. i believed fully that she was a dancer and that she had been doing it for her entire life. she is so committed to the part and is such a powerful actress.  all of the supporting cast is genius too. even winona ryder who has a small part as the retiring prima ballerina, is absolutely perfect. they only real problem i have is with the actual story. it's kinda boring and by the halfway point it's sort of predictable. like super predictable. the only thing that keeps you engaged is the absolutely ghastly body contortions. i could vomit. the last 10 minutes of the film were my favorite. the ballet was stunning and freaky and beautiful and oh-so-freaky.

so, have you ventured out to see black swan? if so, did you enjoy it? do you sorta have a crush on mila kunis now!? are you equally obsessed with the costumes!?! if you haven't seen the film, does it intrigue you? will you ever see it?

sex and the city 2 is a movie...

and that's about all i can say good for the plot of satc2, more like offensive and the middle east. i wasn't going to write about it, but after having some fun banter on twitter with friends and realizing that a lot more people enjoyed it than i thought, it seemed appropriate to push everyone's buttons and get folks talking about this giant piece of crap.

first, let me say that with all of my bitching... the clothes... oh the clothes. i mean patricia field really went off the deep end with this one!!!! i freaking loved it... it was all hot. the dior tee with the zac posen skirt and custom made manolo's were the greatest thing i have ever seen... it was all beautiful and wild.

the basics. the film opens with the girls. all happy, doing whatever they were doing at the end of the last movie. carrie is whining because she and big aren't fun. miranda hates her boss so she quits. samantha is a skank. and charlotte hates being mom sometimes. samantha is offered a free trip to abu dhabi so the girls all go. without giving away to much, when they get there it's luxurious and over the top, which was fine, but carrie runs into aidan. oh geez. that can't end well. who doesn't love making conflict out of nothing!? stupid. and basically samantha is a hoebag and she gets herself into trouble which gets them all kicked out of the hotel... and gasp, carrie left her passport in the market... likely tale lalohan tried that one. this, of course, leads to what i feel was just the worst of it all. i found the ending of the film so disrespectful and tacky! i am offended that it was even thought of as funny. women in the middle east can be severely punished for what they did and i just couldn't watch. they don't seem to have a problem making a joke out of it. it wasn't funny.

so the breakdown. yes, the movie was so bad that they added a karaoke scene. yes... that's right. when would it even have been remotely possible on the series for the ladies to sing karaoke!?!? the whole film just seemed forced and grasping for funny. the one liners that kept the show going fell flat and they had to rely heavily on the braless nanny's tots flopping around for a laugh. carrie was whinier than ever... didn't she get what she wanted!?!? samantha was even more disgusting than ever. miranda was barely even a main character, although her 80's self cracked me up. and the only real moments on the screen were with charlotte. when she was wearing her vintage valentino to bake, yeah right, and lily finger painted her ass. well, i nearly cried then, but that moment in the closet was heartbreaking. and her conversation with miranda at the bar was hilarious and sad and real. i also very much liked carrie's butler and the paula abdul jokes. but other than that i have to say that this film is best watched on mute or not at all.

so, what do you think!? should i just chill out and enjoy it for the crappy "fun" movie that it is? did you like the clothes? or were they too over the top for you? would you see another satc? do you think they should stop making satc films? talk to me.

i'll be back soon with an awesome post from atlanta! i was in a fashion show last week. whatwhat!?

glocally speaking...

so, i live in the middle of nowhere, this is nothing new, but we aren't known for getting many less than gigantic films and if we do they only stay in the theatre for two seconds, it's ridiculous. my list of must see films keeps getting longer and longer, but thankfully up in the air was still playing and can now be crossed off that list.

this film was perfect. i loved everything about it. the three main characters were wonderfully acted by clooney, vera farmiga, and anna kendrick. the movie was funny, offbeat and full of amazing moments. the story revolves around ryan bingham(clooney) and his quest to be the 7th person to acquire 10 million skymiles. he has the deeply depressing job of being hired by pansy companies to fire their employees. during his many travels, he meets and has a fling with the equally travel happy alex(farmiga). their relationship is interesting, believable, and heartbreaking. ryan's quest towards 10 mil is thwarted when the fresh out of college natalie(kendrick) helps restructure the company to be more efficient and cost affective. translation, no more travel, firing folks from a computer. ryan is distraught by the companies decision and in an oh-so-predictable turn of events, gets to show natalie the ropes by doing his last few jobs on the road with her in tow. the story is beautiful, rich, and the lessons that ryan and natalie are able to learn from one another are transcendent...the opposite of cheesy... gripping, but without being too serious. I just can't say enough good things...

clooney is so good at playing the part of the sky-mile happy loner that you begin to wonder if they are in fact the same person, seriously, this role is meant for him. vera farmiga's performance is so mysterious and sexy, like it's hard not to have a little girl crush on her. and finally, anna kendrick is stellar, amazing, genius, brilliant...i don't know what else to say. i told you after twilight and new moon, that this chick was going places. she is such a joy to see on screen, she is able to capture emotions so well and translates them with perfectly clarity. She really deserves every ounce of praise she gets for this film.

so, yeah, you need to see this movie. let me know what you think, already seen it? agree? disagree? any movies i must see? fill me in.

hate the haters. new moon rules.

so i saw new moon at midnight on thursday evening. and it was an adventure. lindsay and i had a delightful evening. figo pasta for dinner. i was going to have mushroom ravioli, but opted not to be that big of a nerd. if you understand why that makes me a nerd then you are also a giant freaking nerd. we got to the theatre around 9:30 and after taking innapropriate pictures with the posters outside we decided to try our hand at waiting inside, it was damn cold. well, to our surprise we could already be seated. so we sat down, it just so happened to be in club luna nueva. it was hilarious. we seriously cracking up. the quote of the night was by a giant latino gentlemen, who stated, "new moon will make people do some crazy shit!" we were dying! they actually moved seats before the movie started. well, it got a lot less interesting and much quieter. we also saw a ton of uuuugly homemade t-shirts, stating team jacob/edward, or our favorites "team jailbait" ew, gross. the hallways were cramped with lunatic soccor moms. seriously, like 45 years old running around screaming, "who's team edward?!?!" then "who's team jacob?!?" i wanted to scream, "who's a buckhead betty still buzzed from your two o'clock martini-fest!?!?"

isn't my outfit soooo cute? gap skinny jeans, matisse boots, homemade twilight tee...shut it, j.crew cardigan, and my forever 21 hoodie...that i get so many compliments on, it cost 30 dollars, awesome. that's my new hair cut/color too. i loooove it. hodge is a genius.

okay, so it's review time. the trailers started and the audience went wild and to my excitement rarely annoyed again with the exception of the child like giggles that erupted everytime anyone was shirtless. so, what can i say? other than i was a huge fan. i thought it did the books proud and even managed to make it a tad less cheesey. new moon is my favorite of the series and i don't feel like anything too important was left out. the story, of course, follows bella after her vampire love edward leaves her. she is helped out of her vampire coma by her good friend jacob black who happens to be a werewolf. ah, the drama of teenage love. well, of course it get's very exciting when edward thinks bella is dead and decides to off himself. i don't want to give away too much, but really, who doesn't know the story?

the biggest complaint from major film critics was the film's overall downtrodden energy, which i thought was perfect. the whole book is a big depress-fest. i thought that kristen did a beautiful job of showing her loss without being a crybaby, which is true to the story. a few critics also claimed that it lacked the inspiration of the first film...i dissagree, in fact, i think that many things were improved in this film. i thought that this movie was a much closer representation of the book. there were some things that i wish were in the movie, but i didn't feel like anything was lost, whereas in the twilight, i feel like a ton of scenes were left out that really needed to in the film. i thought that the actors did a much better job, seriously, kristen and rob really uped their game and taylor lautner really shocked me. he's going to be a great pain in the ass in eclipse. i loved all the action added in by the filmmakers. plus, i thought in the midst of all the saddness, it was really funny. and dear lord, the special effects were a trillion times better!!!! thank you chris wietz! even the most tight assed critic would have to agree with me about that. i also thought the casting was superb, the volutri, were amazing!! omg, martin sheen as aro was crazy creepy and just soooo good. and dakota fanning was fabulous, she is great at being bad good for her, i mean, her face when bella is immune to her power was priceless. love it.

my biggest complaint was with the music. it sucked. the score was soooo cheesy and really bothered me. the score in the first film was far more interesting, creepy and solemn. i felt like the score almost gave away what was going to happen next. i also thought that the loooong upclose shots were a bit much. i mean, i like looking at jacob's 45 pack just as much as the next girl, but it was like enough already...the only omitted scene i really wish was in the film was when alice talks to charlie while bella is supposed to be "sleeping" but i really don't feel let down. i expected the cheesy dialogue and the childish story...but isn't that kind of the appeal? i mean we like it because it makes us feel like sex crazed teenagers again?

i thought in the end i think that if you are a fan, you will still be a fan. i think if you are a normal human being and not a movie snob and you have a vagina you are probably going to like it. if you are a normal human being and not a movie snob and have a penis you may like it. otherwise, if you are an alien and a movie snob you are probably not going to be a fan...

so what did you think? love it? hate it? anything you are pissed wasn't included? tell me all of your thoughts. just don't be unnecessarily mean. i will delete you.

have you seen zombieland?

if the answer is no, then why the hell not? it is hilarious! bo and i have been anticipating this film for quite some time now and it completely lives up to the hype. omg! i haven't laughed that hard in a really long time. it is the most delightful mix of comedy and and horror zombie flick! i really think this might be my favorite movie of the year. woody harrelson is unbelievably funny and still gives the movie a huge piece of heart. jesse eisenberg, emma stone, and abigail breslin are the perfect supporting cast and really i just can't say enough good things. this movie is such a delight!!!! it is a really interesting story between two very different men just trying to survive a world full of bloodsucking, flesh eating zombies, how poetic?

**and just to save you some running around after, bring a box of twinkies to the theatre, trust me! now, nut up or shut up!!!!!!

so cute. too bad the movie sucked.

kate and anne. adorable. both of them have impeccable fashion sense, the photo to the right another fantastic example, kate in temperley london and anne in j. brand. but why god, oh why, did they have to make a movie together. bo and i decided we needed some laughter and both secretly wanted to see bride wars. (don't let him tell you otherwise) for the first time in a long time i wanted to leave the theatre. first off, it wasn't funny, not even a little bit and for the record, osiai are very laughy people. also, the story was ridiculous, even for a romantic comedy the plot was just juvenile and redundant. not to mention the joy that is wedding playing was no where to be found. where were all of the pretty dresses, the pretty flowers, and let's not forget all of the nightmarish bridesmaids dresses. i love both actress and find their previous work delightful, which is probably why i am so disappointed. so that is my review, not very insightful, i know, but trust me...it was awful. so overall, i say you are better off spending your dough on a barium enema. and if you aren't up for that i can highly recommend the curious case of benjamin button or gran torino.