met gala 2010: not awesome...

now, as we all know the met gala is full of fashion... now this doesn't mean that the fashion is going to be good fashion... while i was a fan of most of the looks... these listed below were just soooo... not good.

vera farmiga in sophie theallet for gap. um... well... hmm... what do you want me to say? this is pretty clearly a disaster. like a humogaloid catastrophic disaster... the color is just disgusting and the black accents are just so juvenile. the sleeves, the skirt... this just makes me want to vomit. her hair and makeup, while nice, can't make up for this bucket of yuck.

 

oh holy lord, what is the point of being young, rich, talented(him), and stunningly beautiful if you are just going to ruin it with this kinda ugly. they are both in ralph lauren and both look, well, bad. her dress does very little to show off her smoking hot body and his suit looks complicated and shiny. like abnormally shiny. they both look wrinkly... omg, do you think they did it in the car on the way there??? they totally did, that's the only way to explain that super nasty hair. right??

...next... 

the queen of the world oprah! she walked the carpet with her designer mr. oscar de la renta(love). and well, i am sorry, but this is just bad. i mean, it's nice that it shows her waist, but really there is nothing super special about this... it's just like... she's a big girl throw her in a dark color with sleeves and a full skirt... unimaginative. what!? sorry, i only speak the truth... 

you all know i love me some carey mulligan, but this miu miu frock would be better suited for regis and kelly or a picnic. it is soooooo inappropriate for this occasion. i'm bothered... if you get to wear a big pretty dress... do it!!! if you don't want to wear one, i sure as hell will take your place... geez!!

maybe it's the eye makeup or overdone silhouette, but this gown on eva longoria isn't exciting. this marchesa just looks like a marchesa... and my lord, let's talk about that eyeshadow... holy bananas, can we turn it down a notch... you think she has to work a drag show after the gala...  

this is a first, eva mendes not good. i'm sorry, but this d&g gown is not at all flattering on someone i consider the MOST beautiful woman in the world. as always her hair and makeup are flawless, but that gown is just ridiculous... it looks like wallpaper from the early 90's. i want my pretty eva back... 

well, it should come as no surprise that i find this atrocious. the worst part isn't even the gown complete with glow in the dark panels... but the cheesy hair... hello we get it, you like looking like a pin up girl... and that necklace, i'm sure it's worth millions, but with this gown on her it looks CHEAP. she is a weird one. 

remember when renee zellweger could open her eyes all the way!? she has done something to her face... and it drives me bonkers... and that hair, dear jesus, not good. and this dress is just like the most boring thing i could possibly think of, it looks exactly like the last 3350 dresses she has worn. snore. where is dorothy boyd and her audrey hepburn movie dress?!? and her eyes fully open!?!? i want that renee back. 

sooooo. they just let anyone come to these things. i like malin akerman, but she either has a terrible stylist or can't dress herself to save her life... nooooo way. and someone should tell her that she forgot to do her hair...

the grammys, as crazy as ever!

it wouldn't be the grammys without a bunch of freaking crazy...and oh yes, there was some freaking crazy. but as this is the grammys, this sort of ridiculous behavior is acceptable...i'm still going to be mean. 

oh dear, it's lady gaga...doing what she does best, scaring the shit of people. she's like a clown, she's supposed to be fun and entertaining, but really she's just terrifying. bo thinks it looks like the fortress of solitude. hahaha. this gown believe it or not was created by armani prive, which is really something, that she is getting super designers to make clothes for her. the worst part is that her who-ha is just like peeking out from the rings...soooo bad. maybe this wouldn't be as awful if she didn't have the pastel pink lips, pee yellow hair, and insane eye makeup. oh yikes, yes it would be just as bad. 

well, hmmm, okay. britney spears looks okay. the hair and makeup are a billion times better than normal, but this d&g dress makes me sorta sad...i feel like we are taking a giant step back. i mean her body looks great, but the crotch and tummy panel of this dress just look awful and the sheer black tights, wtf!?! so icky!!! i wish i had a better angle to see if this was decent from any side...no, no. 

this girl needs to stop. like really stop. stop singing. stop going out in public. stop purchasing glitter. stop smoking, whatever various drugs that make your eyes look like that. this is just so much nasty. with the big knockers this dress just looks slutty. she is just the definition of hot damn mess. oh, this is kesha, i refuse to type a $ in her name. yikes, this is what is happening to music. it's dying slowly. 

malin akerman is generally pretty cute, but this is just a tacky mess of tacky. i mean those boots are terrible. and who ever told her it would be a good idea to wear them with this tin foil dress should be fired. no, shot. 

pink, my darling pink. now, this isn't that bad for pink, but it's just kinda much. the glitter, the scallops, the pseudo-crumb catcher, the ombre. i think she looks fantastic, this just doesn't completely do it for me.  but again, for pink this is pretty great. 

oh dear. someone needs to inform j.lo that she isn't 20 anymore. this versace isn't even flattering to her rocking body. plus, that monster hair and the crazy smoking eye is just not doing it for me. the best part are the bracelets. 

whatcha sayyyyy, i say this looks like a pile of nasty. like you must be insane, imogen heap. right? normal people don't leave the house going to the grammys carrying a parasol, a lucite purse, granny's dress, and whatever the crap is around her neck? rounds? a belt? ugly? yes.